Wednesday, August 25, 2004

TOO DEEP!!! LET'S MAKE SURE HE'S VOTED OUT THIS ELECTION YEAR!!! A look at George Dubya's remarkable resume:

"George W. Bush
The White House, USA



I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not available.

I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about my drug use. By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.

I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.

I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock. I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money. With the help of my father and our right-wing friends in the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.

I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the Union. During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city in America. I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of billions in borrowed money. I set the record for the most executions by any governor in American history. With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became President after losing by over 500,000 votes.

I am the first President in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record. I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over one billion dollars per week. I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury. I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history. I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any Administration in U.S. history. My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her. I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S. President. I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations. My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my bestest friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History, Enron. My political party used Enron private jets and corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision. I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton against investigation or prosecution. More time and money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history. I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was revealed. I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts (so my friends could still be in business). I appointed more convicted criminals to an administration than any President in U.S. history. I've broken more international treaties than any President In U.S. history. I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election). I set the record for fewest number of press conferences of any President since the advent of television. I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period.! After taking off the entire month of August, I presided over the worst security failure in U.S. history - September 11, 2001. I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most hated country in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in world history. I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people), shattering the record for protest against any person in the history of mankind. I am the first President in U.S. history to order an unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S. citizens, and the world community. I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families in war time.

In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for attacking Iraq, then blamed the lies on our British friends. I am the first President in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security.

All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father's library, sealed and unavailable for public view. All records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and my Bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view. All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.


Bush is wack

One of my friends sent me this in an e-mail. So anyways, down with Condoleeza Rice!! And Richard Nixon!! No wait...

Friday, August 20, 2004

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the two most powerful men in America are named 'Bush' and 'Dick'.

Found this on some message board.

Thursday, August 12, 2004

"I support gay marriage. I believe gays should have the same right to marry members of the opposite sex as everybody else."

Found that on a message board too, haha.

Tuesday, August 03, 2004

George Lucas: The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones are "VERY HARD TO FOLLOW." Compared to the cookie cutter, no-brain action films Hollywood pumps out on a weekly basis, YES they are incredibly hard to follow. Consider how stupid the average movie goer is, the short attention span (if something doesn't blow up every 15 seconds they fall asleep) and it's really not suprising. If you're smarter than that average then rejoice, but don't pretend everyone is keeping up with you. If they were then a movie like Alien VS Predator would never have been made.

Update: Click here to hear Yoda fart. "Slimy? Mudhole? My anus, this is."

This picture is wrong on so many levels.
Yoda pretending he's Kobe.

I'd like to meet the person who put this thong on, haha...

'Kay, ENOUGH childishness.