So What Would Jim Halpert Do? Ever since I returned from my trip to Tennessee almost a month ago, things have been a bit emo for me in regards to this girl that I really like at work. (Yes I know— "How old are you? 15?") I've been resisting the urge to write about her on this page... Not because it's unlikely that she'll find this entry (unless she Googles 'Jim Halpert,' 'Pam Beasley' or The Office or something), but because these articles ended up being (catharsis aside) all for naught. Every other girl that I blogged about over the last um, 10 years inevitably ended up getting with someone else (and becoming married; yay for 'oneitis')...so I'd be highly delusional to think that this rant would improve my chances with Ni—err, Nancy in any type of way. (I almost mentioned her real name here. Phew.)
Ever since Nancy and I first met last December (although I saw her at work as early as January of 2012), things have been cool between us. We always sat and hung out together at work. There was even this one time she asked me to take a walk with her—just the two of us—in an empty parking lot near the place where we were at (more on this later). However, from the outset of all this she told me that she was already engaged. Initially, I didn't care...as my feelings for Nancy didn't grow until we started to work together more often earlier this year.
What makes Nancy so great to be around is that she's easy to talk to, she jokes a lot, she's unpretentious (despite the fact she posts really gorgeous photos on Facebook... Keep reading further despite the fact I'm veering into so-called 'creeper' territory here) and...she likes 1980s action flicks and recent movies that feature 1980s action stars in 'em. (There was one time where she wanted to leave work ASAP so she could buy The Expendables 2 on DVD. No, it wasn't a gift for someone else.) Oh, and she reciprocates— Once Nancy added me on Facebook, I clicked 'Like' on the very first image (a self-portrait that Nancy took with her iPhone, if you need to ask) she uploaded right after we became friends. Not too long after, Nancy clicked 'Like' on a photo that I uploaded to my Facebook page. Of course, it probably helped that the picture I posted happened to be one that I took with a certain gorgeous MasterChef winner in Costa Mesa a few months back.
So where did things start to become all emo for me, you ask? In Ontario (California), more than a month ago. As I mentioned earlier, we always sat and hung out together at work. But what really endeared herself to me was when Nancy asked me to walk with her in that parking lot stated two paragraphs above. Granted, this took place during our lunch break...and she obviously wanted to burn off calories from the food that she ate a few minutes earlier, and wanted someone to keep her company during her stroll. But the fact that Nancy asked me to be alone with her (not to imply that I'm a wacko or anything... I'm only crazy enough to jump out of an aircraft 5.5 miles above the ground, hah) showed just how much she trusted and felt comfortable around me. We'll gloss over the truth that Nancy views me only as a good friend and that's why she did that. (Oh look, isn't that how Pam Beasley felt about Jim before he made a move on her in The Office's Season 2 finale? Anyways.)
Combine the fact that we bonded during the walk with us hugging before going our separate ways at the end of that day, and you have me start to develop feelings for that co-worker. (Just like in The Offi— okay, you get the point.) This memorable day was actually the last time I worked before I left for Memphis on April 27 (a Saturday)...and it didn't help that Nancy ended up going to Las Vegas that same weekend. Initially, she was reluctant to go; one of the main topics during our parking lot conversation was that she was invited on this Sin City trip by another female co-worker...who's divorced and has a daughter. (You can see where I'm going with this. Or maybe you don't.) Nancy, being unpretentious as mentioned two paragraphs above, didn't know just how crazy this lady could get when boozin' up...so our talk in Ontario involved me asking Nancy if she was ready to accept just how wild this co-worker (and other people who went with them on this trip) could potentially get while strolling out on the Vegas Strip. I myself didn't want Nancy to go... Despite the fact she's engaged to someone else, the thought of a divorced chick trying to bring Nancy down to her level (if you met Nancy in person, then you'd know what I'm talking about) irked me.
What made matters worse about this Las Vegas trip was that it didn't take place on the weekend that Nancy said she was originally going (which was two days after our gig in Ontario). The Vegas trip took place exactly a week later (yes, I was off from work for more than 7 days before I left for Tennessee)...which made it coincide with the time that I was in Whiteville to conduct the H.A.L.O jump. Of course, in the two days leading up to my 30,000-foot skydive, this jump was the only thing that I could think about. However, once this endeavor was successfully completed on April 29, it was pretty much out of my system (almost 7 years after it got into my system in the first place). So overlooking the fact that I was totally stoked over what I had just accomplished in Whiteville that day, my thoughts started shifting to what Nancy was doing almost two thousand miles to the west of me.
As mentioned earlier, the thought of someone trying to bring Nancy down to their level in Las Vegas annoyed me...but I knew that nothing bad was going to happen. Nancy was engaged...so what preoccupied my thoughts instead wasn't what she was doing in Vegas but how she was dressed hanging out over there with this group. In the last two days of my trip in Tennessee, all I could think about was heading back home to Los Angeles, logging onto Facebook, and seeing what provocative photos—if any—she uploaded or was tagged in. (Hey, if Radiohead can be a 'creep,' then so can I.) And it didn't help that my flight from Memphis had a brief stopover in Las Vegas before the final leg of my journey back to SoCal on May 1... Needless to say, my thoughts were fixated on Nancy (and a couple of slot machines that were amusingly placed near the Delta Air Lines gate where I boarded my L.A.-bound flight) as I sat and waited in the McCarran terminal.
When I arrived home from Los Angeles International Airport that evening, the first thing I did (even before I removed from my luggage the large envelope containing my H.A.L.O. jump certificate, the DVD with my skydive video on it and the USB drive containing raw footage and photos from the jump) was turn my computer on and then log onto Facebook. (Yes, I needed to get a new phone so I could visit Facebook while I was out in Tennessee. Not necessarily an iPhone). And lo and behold, Nancy posted a picture (Begin playing 'Creep' by Radiohead) where she's wearing a sexy black dress that reveals most of her (well-toned) back—and was tagged by the divorced chick in an image where Nancy's wearing a bikini. Can you say... Hot and bothered? (And creepy? I kid. I KID.) These photos were posted three days before I returned to L.A., so all I could do was check these pictures out since I wasn't in position to click 'Like' on them. [I didn't have a valid reason (presumably) to like these images till last weekend.]
So to make a long-ass story not as long as it should be (Michael Scott: "That's what she said!"), these Vegas photos intensified my attraction towards Nancy. I'll resist the urge to mention how she wasn't one of the people who clicked 'Like' or commented (yes, I'm contradicting my earlier claim that she reciprocates) on my H.A.L.O. pictures and video after I posted them on Facebook...and that Nancy actually gave off an irritated vibe (maybe she was hoping that I would've spent the money I paid for the skydive on taking her to a nice dinner and/or a cruise to Catalina Island instead? Yea, I wish) when my trip was brought up during a job we worked together in Northridge (California) about a week later (this was the first gig I got since returning from Tennessee). Speaking of Northridge and overlooking her indifference to my H.A.L.O. trip— Things were going awesome between us like they usually did in the previous assignments we worked together...until 30 minutes before we were to go home. Won't go into specific details (since I should've mentioned what it is I actually do for a living at the beginning of this Blog entry. Keep on guessin'), but Nancy ended up sitting with someone else right before we were about to wrap for that day. More on this in the next paragraph...
To continue on from the previous paragraph, I WAS PISSED. I didn't know what I did wrong to make Nancy diss me like that at the very last moment. Actually, I might have an idea... But it involves me going into a rant about other dudes at work who walk up to Nancy to start a conversation with her while I'm sitting nearby. C*ckblockin' douchebags. Unlike all the other times I was with Nancy, I went home without saying 'bye' or any other word to her. The thing is, the hurt that I felt from this debacle in Northridge only intensified my feelings toward Nancy. So basically, just like every other girl I blogged about before her, Nancy made me like her even more because she rejected me that night. And I can write another interminably-long article about how I have a futile attraction towards girls who play hard to get. ('Cause you know, they're already in relationships?)
So to end this entry, the high that I experienced after I conducted the H.A.L.O. jump is matched by the low that I've felt thinking about Nancy over the last four weeks. I don't have much of an appetite when I eat breakfast (kinda like how Jim Halpert told Dwight Shrute that he couldn't eat because of his feelings for Pam in a Season 4 episode of The Office), since I immediately wanted to log onto Facebook and see if Nancy posted something after I got out of bed in the morning. I actually dread the next time that I see her...which may be on a job assignment that I got booked on for next Tuesday. So basically, I'm at a loss for what to do. If this were a TV show, then I'd walk up to Nancy this Tuesday (if she shows up) and tell here how she makes me feel—and then she'll dump her fiancé of God-knows-how-long-they've-been-together and we happily watch The Expendables 2 over and over, forever. But this isn't a TV show, and Nancy will most definitely be mortified if she ever stumbles upon this entry. And I'll become emo over the next girl I meet while Nancy eventually starts posting photos from her wedding ceremony (whenever that will be) on Facebook. Yay for oneitis! That is all.
